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Sunday, April 25, 2010

Tips for positive parenting

Parenting is an important issue in all families. Positive parenting will exert good influence on children and will help to sharp good behaviour. If our children are guided properly and positive value are being taught, they will grow up to be a good person with high inner value. They will not turn to drug, gangs, sex and do bad things. They will become good citizen who contribute to their countries and societies.

What is positive parenting? Positive parenting will include certain elements.

Below are some tips for positive parenting:

1. Help our children to build their self esteem

We have to praise our children for their accomplishment no matter how small it is. Our children will feel important and valued if we praise them. Through praising, our children will be motivated internally and this will help to build their self-esteem. Avoid unfavourable comments even when our children do not meet our expectation. In addition, letting our children do things independently will boost their confidence once they succeed in doing them, this will build their self worth. Even if our children do not succeed in doing things on their own, it is important to give them a pat on the back for their effort and encourage them to keep trying and let them know that failure is the mother of success.

2. Spend quality time with our children

Make time for our children. Spend quality time with them. Even though we are busy every day, we have to allocate some time for our children. We have to be fully devoted when we spend time with our children. The amount of time spent is not important but the essence of time spent is important. Spending time with our children enable us to enjoy activities together with our children. It will help to improve communication between parents and children and enable parents to bond with children.

3. Become a role model to our children

Children will learn the behaviour of parents. Therefore, it is important for us to set a good example for our children. We must speak and act properly. When we speak we must not use improper words for example four letters word. We must keep our behaviour in check and do not pursue bad habits for example taking drugs, smoking, drinking alcohol, gambling or do bad things for example stealing. We must always think twice before we speak or act. We must try our best to become role models to our children.

4. Help our children understand their responsibilities

We must ensure our children understand their responsibilities in different social settings. Let them know their responsibilities at home, in school and in society. Helping our children understand their responsibilities will assist them to accept their responsibilities. This will nurture our children to become responsible persons.

5. Make them feel love and accepted

Love can settle a lot of problems. Therefore it is important to love our children sufficiently. They will feel accepted and a sense of belonging if they are sufficiently loved. This will boost their confidence. In addition, we must learn to forgive our children for their mistakes. Make sure that they understand the consequences of their mistakes and ensure that they will never repeat the same mistakes again. We must accept handicapped children the way they are and assist them in their daily lives.

6. Be kind but firm in discipline and avoid spanking

In discipling our children, we should avoid spanking. We must communicate to our children what is the acceptable behaviour. We must let them know what is our limit and what are expected from them. Let them know the consequences of bad behaviour. We may impose time out if our children are not behaving properly.

7. Encourage and reward good behaviour

When our children do something good, remember to give them a pat on the back or some encouragement. Reward our children for their good behaviour. This will reinforce good value in our children. Letting them know what is right and wrong is important. Encouragement will help to instill good behaviour.

8. Communicate properly with our children

Proper communication is important. We will know our children better if we often communicate with them. Our children will feel that we have an interest in their lives if we communicate with them often and properly. They will know that we care and love them. There will be a sense of belonging and love. This is crucial for the development of our children.

9. Teach our children to love one another

We must always encourage our children to love one another and help each other out. We should be fair to all our children and do not let them feel insecure. Sibling’s rivalry is unhealthy and should be avoided. A close knitted family where one helps one and another is important. Teach our children to respect one another.

10. Be flexible in parenting styles

There is no rule of thumb parenting style that suits all kind of situation. Children are changeable and unpredictable, therefore, we must also be flexible with our parenting styles to accommodate different situation.

Parenting can be the most rewarding job in the world if we can cope with our children. Therefore, positive parenting is important in raising our children. We will enjoy our children more if we practise positive parenting.

Friday, April 9, 2010

How to motivate ourselves

Our life is not always smooth sailing. There are bound to be some setbacks and some hindrance along the way. It is important for us to stay motivated to overcome all the barriers in order to achieve our goals in lives and live happily. People will have the desire to achieve success if they are motivated. Therefore, motivation is important for success.

How to overcome the feeling of defeat, regain confidence and stay motivated whenever we stumble and fall?

(1) Clear direction of what we want

It is important for us to understand what we really want to achieve in our lives. Our desires will serve as impetus that will move us forward. If our desires for something are strong, the more we will be motivated. Therefore, we need to figure out what we really interested in.

(2) Read inspiration materials

We can motivate ourselves by reading some materials such as motivational books, biography, success stories, blogs, etc. By reading the biography of a successful person, we can gain an insight into the experiences of him/her. He/she will be a role model to us. He/She will inspire us.

(3) Surround ourselves with positive people

Make an effort to be friend with people with positive mindset. We will be happier and more optimistic when people who are positive and love lives surround us. We can feel their joy. They will influence our thinking. Our friends can set good example for us to live our lives positively.

(4) Look at the positive side of every negative situation

We have to believe that there is always a positive side for every negative situation for example if your spouse is out of job, the family income may be dwindled but your spouse will have more time to spend with the children and to bond with them. It may also be the time for your spouse to venture into his/her own business if he/she has some capital. We have to understand that there may be blessing in disguise for every negative situation.

(5) Be gratitude

Practice gratitude every day. We have to be grateful for what we have. Be gratitude to god, our spouse, children, parents and friends. If we are gratitude, we will feel that our lives are meaningful even when we are facing some setbacks.

(6) Do not compare yourself with others

Each person is unique in his/her own way. Understand our strength and know our limitation. Stop comparing ourselves with others. We will be happier if we stop comparing with others. Work towards our strength and take steps to overcome our weakness.

(7) Do not be afraid of failure

We have to see failure as small setback in our lives rather than total disaster. Do not be afraid for making mistakes and understand that we can always learn from mistakes. Always look for alternative ways in achieving our goals. If this way is not working, try other ways. Understand that failure is the mother of success and believe that through persistency we will be able to succeed.

(8) Take critic constructively

Be positive and take people’s comment constructively. If we can take critic constructively, we will not feel upset or humiliated with people’s comment. Rather than feeling upset, we will be motivated to improve ourselves to achieve better result.

(9) Reward yourself

Remember to reward ourselves whenever we achieve our goals. Give ourselves a pat on the back; this will further motivate us to achieve other goals in our lives.

Knowing ourselves and knowing how to keep ourselves motivated will enable us to achieve our goals in life. Our lives will be more fulfilling and meaningful.

Friday, April 2, 2010

How to spend less and save more

We tend to spend more when we have money. If we are not careful, we will easily over spend. Over spending often leads us to debts. In addition, we will be in possession of things that are unnecessary and less meaningful.

We need money to sustain our living. Therefore, money is important. It is important to set aside money for emergency and for the accomplishment of major financial decision like buying a house, kids education, retirement, etc.

How to slash spending and maximize saving?

1. Create a cost saving budget

Budget will keep us from spending lavishly. If we spend according to our budget, we will not over spend and we may even be able to squeeze some money out of our budget for saving. Therefore it is important to budget.  We can create a budget by bringing together all our monthly income after taxes and tracking all our expenses. Our budget has to be flexible and varied with our income level. However, to live on a budget may not be easy at first, it requires a lot of discipline and persistent. Start by taking a baby step and slowly settling into  living on budget.

2. Use cash instead of credit cards

Credit cards bring convenience into our lives. With credit cards we can buy things easily even though we are not carrying any cash. We will not think much before we buy due to the convenience of using credit cards. We will easily get ourselves into over spending and debts. Therefore, it is wise to limit the use of credit cards and always spend on cash. We can reduce the number of credit cards by keeping only one or two credit cards for emergency.

3. Look for ways to save money daily

We spend every day in order to sustain our living, therefore it is important to look into our daily lives and find ways to save money.

Below are some areas and ways that we can save money daily:

a) Food

We need food for energy and to sustain our lives. Food makes up a large part of our grocery bills; therefore, we have to be careful with food. We tend to buy more when we are hungry. Therefore, we should not go shopping for our grocery with empty stomach. Always make a list of grocery that we have to buy, as this will prevent us from buying too much unnecessary stuff. Below are some ways to save on food:
-Try coupon clipping;

-Go to the supermarket to shop only on discount days for example in Hong Kong, many supermarkets offer discount on Friday;

-Buy food and cook food that is on sale;

-Buy food in bulk when there are cheap sales;

-Instead of buying fast food, try to make cost saving dinner from scratch at home;

-Buy cheaper brand food for example instead of buying Dreyer or Häagen-Dazs ice cream buy Nestle ice cream;

-Bring brown bag to the office for lunch;

-Be creative with left over and eat left over;

-Grown our own vegetables if we have garden;

-Cut on junk food
b) Utilities bills

There are many ways that we can save on our utilities bills:

- Use fan instead of air conditioner during summer time;
- Use energy saving light bulbs to light our house;
- Use solar to generate electricity;
- Switch off computer and electrical appliances when they are not in used;
- Have shower instead of bath;
- Turn off tap when brushing teeth;
- Take less bath and shower;
-Run the washing machine only when the laundry is full.

c) Clothing

Clothing can be a large part of spending.  Therefore, we should look for ways to save:

- Embrace” hand me down” passing on old cloth from older kids to younger kids;
- Try to shop at second hand clothing shop;
- Shop out of the season;
- Shop when it is on sales;
- Buy cloth that we can mix and match;
- Learn sewing and sew own cloth;
- Buy classic cloth rather than trendy cloth;

d) Transportation

For those of us who need to travel to work every day, transportation makes up a large part of our daily expenses. We can save some money if we are wise in choosing the mode of transportation every day:

- Use public transport instead of driving own car. This will save us on gasoline and parking fee;
-Practise car-pooling;
-Walk instead of driving to place that is within walking distance
-Travel with public transport at non peak hour to save ticket fares

5. Entertainment

We often reward ourselves after a long day work; therefore, entertainment can be a large part of our daily expenses. With the advance of technology, we can now enjoy cheap mode of entertainment. If we know how to make choices, we will be able to choose the entertainment that is cost saving.

- Read free on line materials such as newspaper, blogs, etc;
- Watch free on line movies;
- Listen to free online music;
- Look for free concert in town;
- Go to libraries instead of buying book from bookstores;
- Go hiking or have a picnic in the park;
- Walk in the park or along the beach;
-Have a restaurant night at home instead of eating out;
-Eat out once a while on non holiday

 6. Traveling

Most of us love traveling because traveling enables us to broaden our horizon. There are several ways that we can have an enjoyable and cost saving holiday:
- Travel off peak season;
- Use cheep airline such as Air Asia, Cebu Pacific, just to name a few;
-Join package tour;

If we use money wisely, we will spend less and save more and this will free us from debts. We will have more happiness, less stress and worries if we are debt free.

Friday, March 26, 2010

Tips for healthy living

Life is full of hope and opportunities. We must have a healthy mind and body to achieve what we want for our lives. How can we have a healthy mind and body? We must embrace healthy living in order to have good health.

What is healthy living? Healthy living is a life style that is characterized by eating well, resting well, socializing well and exercising well. Living healthily will lead us to good mental and physical health.

How to achieve a healthy living? We have to make the right choices in order to live and stay healthy. Below are some simple ways to keep us healthy:

1. Embrace good eating habit and eat a balance diet

We need energy to start our day. Therefore, food is very important to us. However, excessive eating may lead to bad health conditions and obesity. Hence, it is important to shape a good eating habit. It is important to eat the right amount of food at regular time. We must not skip breakfast though some of us might think breakfast is unimportant. We must not eat too much junk food and do not over eat before going to bed. We must get into the habit of eating some fruits every day. We must curb our loving on deep fried food and eat more stewed or steamed food.

A balanced diet that comprising of grain, vegetables, fruit, meat, and dairy product is very important to us. Grain and vegetables are a good source for carbohydrates and fiber. Carbohydrates provide us with energy to conduct physical activities whereas fiber improves our digestion. Meat is a good source for protein. We need protein to grow and to repair our tissues. Our health will be in jeopardy if we are not eating a balance diet.

2. Embrace healthy drinking habit

A healthy drinking habit is important in order to maintain our health. We must drink at least 8 glasses of water a day. We must reduce the amount of drinking on unhealthy beverages such as alcohol, coffee, tea and soft drink. Excessive drinking of alcohol will lead to liver problem. It also causes us to lose control of ourselves when we are drunk. Excessive drinking of coffee or tea will cause us to have sleeping problem because caffeine in coffee or tea will make us awake. When we drink soft drink like coca cola, sprit, etc., we are actually drinking sugar water. A large amount of intake of sugar will lead to obesity and it is bad for our teeth.

3. Do exercise regularly

Exercising is another important factor to maintain good health. No matter how busy and how lazy we are, we must allocate some time to do exercise. A 15 minutes regular exercise of each day will make a different in our lives. The right amount of exercise will reduce stress and give us energy. Sometimes even a little stretching or a short walk will help.

However, we must avoid excessive exercising. Excessive exercising not only leave us physically exhausted, short of breathe but also bad to our bodies. It may lead to pain and muscle torn in some parts of our bodies.

4. Get rid of bad habits and cultivate good habits

Smoking, drinking alcohol, taking drug, and gambling are just a few bad habits that we should get rid of in order to stay healthy. Bad habits not only bad for our health, they also lead to other problems such as financial, emotional and social problems.

We must cultivate good habit such as sleeping on time and have healthy hobbies such as reading, hiking, singing, etc. Good habits and healthy hobbies will lead to success in lives.

5. Maintain personal hygiene and a clean and peaceful living environment

We must maintain personal hygiene in order to have good health. We must bath at least once a day to keep ourselves clean. Washing hands regularly especially after we use the washrooms and before eating is a good habit that we should practise.

In addition, we have to ensure that our living environment is clean and tidy. A living environment that is clean will give us quality of life. We will not be exposed to toxin and germ and this will keep us from illness. A peaceful living environment will enable to rest well.

6. Get the right amount of rest or sleep

Our bodies and mind will be exhausted after a full day’s work or activities. Sleep enables us to rest our bodies and mind. In addition, sleep replenishes our energy; therefore it is important to have enough sleep daily. An adult should have at least 8 hours of quality sleep whereas a child below the age of 12 should have at least 10 hours sleep.

7. Socializing with family members and friends

In pursuing our busy life, we must not forget to socialize with our family members and friends. A loving family and a circle of good friends that are supportive will make us happy. A sense of belonging and love is important to our mental and emotional health.

A healthy mind and body enable us to live our lives to the fullest, therefore, we must embrace healthy living.

Friday, March 19, 2010

How to juggle between work and family

We as working parents today assume many roles - employee, husband, father, wife and mother. We often ask ourselves this question "work first or family first?" There are different answers to this question. For some, the answer is "work first" and for others it is "family first". Our answers are largely depending on what we want to achieve in lives. It is not surprising for a career orientated person who is constantly looking for career advancement to put work first and on the other hand, a family orientated person will put family first. Work provides us with financial security and a sense of fulfillment. Family gives us emotional support, a sense of love and belonging. Therefore, it is important for us to strike a balance between work and family.

"How to juggle between work and family" is a question that commonly asked by us. With the 24 hours that we have a day and with at least 8 hours a day we spend on our job, it is quite difficult for us to juggle between work and family in order to achieve a balance. The following are some tips to achieve a work and family balance.

1. Get a job that is less demanding

First and foremost, it is important for us to land on a "family friendly" job. What is a "family friendly" job? A "family friendly" job is a job that is not too demanding, less busy, less stressful, and less traveling and which allows us to spend more time with our family. A demanding job will leave us too tired both mentally and physically at the end of the day.

If our job is too demanding we can consider switching to a job that is more relaxing and flexible but still offers the level of income that can sustain our living comfortably.

In addition, it is good to have an understanding boss who understands our needs for our family. An understanding boss will be more empathy, considerate and sensitive. Therefore it is important to have open communication with our boss making sure that our boss knows our needs.

2. Grab free time that we have every day

Our free time within a day can be divided into:

a. Pre work hour

b. After work hour

a. Pre work hour

Pre work hour refers to the time between waking up and before going to work. We can spend quality time with our family during this time. Start our day by waking up early and taking shower. There are many things that we can do to bond with our children like doing brushing and having breakfast together. We can help our children get changed and get them ready for school. If time allowed, we can send our children to school. While sending our children to school, there is opportunity for us to talk to our children and to bond with them.

b. After work hour

Remember to leave our work on time after work hour if there is no urgent work for us to be finished. We should relax ourselves as much as possible when we are at home after work and do not bring tension from work to home. Always leave our work problem at work. If possible, switch off our mobile phone and do not entertain any work related phone call unless it is really urgent and important.

Some of us may need to entertain clients after work. Even so, we should try to be home for dinner as much as possible. Having family dinner together is the best time to bond with our children. While having dinner with our children, we can generate conversation and know how they are doing on that day. This is a way to increase and improve communication between family members.

After dinner and after all the cleaning, we can help our children with their homework and revision. Helping our children with their homework enables us to know how our children are doing in school. In addition, it also helps our children to better cope with their schoolwork.

While putting our children to bed, we can bond with our children by reading them some bedtime stories. It also helps to cultivate interest in reading among our children.

After our children go to bed, it is our time to relax ourselves and to spend some quality time with our spouse such as chatting, exchanging ideas, watching TV together and etc.

Remember to be in bed on time and to get enough sleep. We should have at least 8 hour of sleep a day.

3. Spend quality time during weekend

Weekend enables us to make up time lost during weekdays with our children. It is important to have family day during weekend where we can spend some quality time together as a family doing family activities such as doing household chores, cooking, reading, doing craft work, playing cards, going to libraries, doing sport, eating out, going for a movie, talking a stroll, etc. These family activities will assist to improve our communication with our children.

4. Take leave for emergency and school activities

When our children fall sick, we should take time off from our work to care for our children. When our children are having examination, we can take annual leave to help our children to revise their studies to better equip them for the examination. It is important to take some time off from our work to attend school activities like school sport days, parent and teacher meeting, outing, etc.

5. Celebrate special occasion together as a family

Remember to celebrate our children birthday and spouse birthday as a family. There are many ways that we can celebrate birthday such as having a party, going for movie, eating out, etc. Remembering and celebrating the birthday of our children and spouse will make them feel important and appreciated. This will enhance the loving relationship between family members.

In addition, we can also celebrate special occasions like Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year, etc. By celebrating these special occasions together, we will be able to enjoy the holiday together as a family. In addition, it also provides an us opportunity to introduce the significance and value of the special occasions to our children.

6. Going for trip as a family

It is important to go for a trip as a family. We can take some annual leave during summer holiday and go for trip with our children as a family. This not only enables us to spend quality time with our family and it also gives us a chance to broaden our horizon. It enables us to relax, rejuvenate and to get away from the hustle and bustle of work for a while.

7. Share work together

Remember we are not super men or super women, therefore it is important to share work or divide work with your spouse. There must be sufficient communication and understanding between spouses. Husband and wife should always be a team that support each other and complement each other. Therefore, husband and wife should always go hand in hand in rising children and doing household chores. Do not leave parenting or domestic duties with only one spouse. It is important to come out with a plan that who will do what. We have to be flexible in sharing work.

8. Have time for ourselves

It is important to have time for ourselves out of the busy day to do some exercise or simply to relax. Make sure that we have enough sleep daily.

Being able to juggle between work and family makes our lives less stressful and more meaningful.

How to become a successful stay at home mom

Quitting our job to become a stay at home mom is a big decision for most of us. There is opportunity cost associated with giving up on our job in order to stay at home and raise our children. We will lose our income and other benefits such as medical insurance and retirement funds by giving up on our job. Our lifestyle will change. In addition, parenting is a challenging job that requires a lot of love, patience and knowledge. We can be both mentally and physically exhausted at the end of the day. Therefore, we have to be ready financially, mentally and physically before transforming ourselves into a stay at home mom.

The following steps will enable us to become a successful stay at home mom:

1. Start planning and savings early

We need to plan financially long before our first child is born. At the time when we are still earning two incomes, we have to set aside our income as much as possible as savings. We will be more financially ready when we quit our job.

2. Be ready to work from home

It is important to pursue interests or hobbies that can be transformed into work long before we plan to stay at home. There are many things that we can do from home that need very little capital and that will bring us income such as writing, designing website, crafting, translating, proofreading, painting, photographing, etc. To be financially more secured we can find ways to work from home. We can conduct work from home when our children are having their nap or while they are in school.

3. Be up to date with our job knowledge and skills

Though we are a stay at home mom, it is wise to find ways to maintain our job knowledge and skills on the career that we leave. By keeping in touch with our ex-colleague, we will be aware of the latest development in our career. We can find resources over the Internet that is useful to update our job knowledge. For professional such as accountants, lawyers, etc., remember to maintain professional membership. When there is a need such as loses of job of our spouse or death of our spouse or divorce, we will be able to return to our career easily. This provides us with safety net.

4. Be mentally ready by reading parenting books, resources, etc and taking parenting class

We have to take care our children by ourselves when our spouse is out for work. It can be hard without the help of our spouse because children can be unpredictable. In order to better equip ourselves for parenting and to help us stay motivated, it is necessary for us to read some materials on parenting. We can find useful parenting materials in bookstores and over the Internet. Through reading, we can get some knowledge on parenting and be more mentally prepared.

5. Be connected with society

Stay connected with society and be aware of what is happening around is very importance for stay at home mom. While staying in touch with your friends, also remember to make new friends. We can get to know other parents by attending school activities, etc. By talking to other parents, we can share parenting experience. By talking to teachers in school, we will know how well our children are doing in school. Do not confine ourselves to home only; we can reach out by doing some volunteer work in school and community. This will make our lives more complete and meaningful.

6. Be organised and set up routine

How to start our day as stay at home mom? We have to plan ahead and be organised. Start making a list or a schedule on the things that we want to do and have to do the night before or earlier. Be realistic and set priority. If we cannot accomplish all the things on our schedule within a day, do not feel disappointed and frustrated. Do not be too hard on ourselves and we have to be flexible in certain situation because our children will not always be listening and following. Therefore, it is importance to make some allowances for disruptions and emergency.

It is importance to introduce routine in order to be more organised. Set the time within a day for our children to play, read, do homework, have nap, etc. Start out small by introducing a routine every two or three weeks. Be simple, realistic, relevance and flexible in setting up routine. In addition, do not give up easily and believe that through our perseverance, we will be able to settling into routine.

7. Remember to ask for help and take rest

Do not try to be super mom or perfect mom, know our limits. Ask for help from our spouse when necessary and do not over stretched ourselves. Take some time off for ourselves during the day to do things that we like or simply take rest to relax our mind and body. During weekend, let our spouse spend more time with our children, this will give us time to rest and re-charged ourselves. It will also allow our spouse to bond with the children, to make up time lost during weekdays. Remember to pamper overselves once a while with luxuries such as massage, facial, spa, manicure, etc.

8. Live frugally

When we choose to stay at home, we are actually living on single income. Therefore, we have to adopt a frugal life style. Try to create a cost saving budget that suits the family. We can try to cut our grocery bills by coupon clipping, bulk purchasing, making meal from scratch, cutting out on junk food, eating left over, etc. We can also cut our utilities bills by using fan and limiting the use of air conditioning during summer time. If we have garden, we can grow our own vegetables. Embracing 'Hand-me-down' and passing down the clothing and toys from our older children to our younger children. Be willing to accept old clothing and toys from relatives and friends. There are many ways to live a frugal life and we have to be creative and persistent in pursuing it.

Being a stay at home mom may need sacrifices especially financially, however if we are well prepared financially, mentally, physically, it can be the most rewarding job for us.

Saturday, March 13, 2010

Becoming a stay at home mom - a decision to make

In the sixties women's place were at home raising their children. With the advancement of society over the years, many women have received higher education and there is a shift of women's place from home to office. In addition, the high cost of living today makes earning additional income inevitable. Many women are working either full time or part time today to support their family.

Therefore, we, women, once have children, are often facing dilemma. There are choices to be made. Some may opt to work full time and leave their children with childcare centers, grandparents, relatives or nannies. On the other hand, some may choose to live on single income and be a stay at home mom.

Our decision to give up our jobs and to stay at home comes with costs. It is a life changing decision; therefore, before we make transition from a working mom to a stay at home mom, it is wise to evaluate the pros and cons of staying at home.

The benefits of staying at home are as below:

1. Bonding with children

Spending time with our children during their formative years is very important. Our children need our attention and loves. If we are stay at home moms, we will be there always to love our children, guide them, instill good values and shape good behaviour. Our children will bond with us more and this will help to develop a loving and trusting relationship between our children and us. This is very important in the development of children.

2. Making sure children's needs are being met

When we are stay at home mom, we can ensure that our children's needs are being met. We make sure that they are properly fed and clothed. We are able to help them with their homework and make sure that they are not late for school. We will be able to ensure that our children go to bed on time. We will have less worries comparing to leaving our children with babysitters.

3. More focus and less stress

Being a stay at home mom, we can focus our attention solely on our family, as we do not have to juggle between work and home. We are the bosses at home and we can decide on schedules that best suited us. We will not bring our tension from work to home. It is less stressful comparing to if we have to divide our time between work and home. Being less stressful, we will have more patience with our children and family.

The disadvantages of being a stay at home mom is as below:

1. Lack of financial security

Being stay at home mom means forgoing our career and living on single income. Living on single income may not be easy given the high cost of living today. In addition, there is less protection on us; we will lose our medical insurance and retirement funds. We may be forced to forgo our present standard of living, as there is less income to sustain it. We will have fewer funds to pay for our mortgage and for emergency. We may lose support in case of death of spouse or divorce. We have to be mentally ready for all these.

2. 24 hours on call

We may be working around the clock at home. Our children may become too attached to us leaving us little time to rest. Our spouse may too dependence on us on running the household. We may end up doing all the household chores such as running errands, cleaning and cooking. We will be both mentally and physically exhausted.

3. Lose touch with society

Our lives as stay at home mom circles around our children and family. We may lose touch with our friends from work since our interests will be mostly on family and children. We will be busy taking care of our family with very little time for socialising with friends, exchanging ideas, etc. Hence, we will be easily lose touch with society.

In closing, whatever decision that we make in the end, it is important to discuss it with our spouse and always ensure that our spouse supports the decision that we are going to make.